You see every time one of them comes towards me, the other seems to run away. It is almost as though they are both tied by the same piece of string.
Perhaps it’s a rope, a really thick one as I have tried to sever it untold times. I think this has been happening for at least four years now, only there hasn’t always been two ends of rope.
The one constant seems to be me, spinning around in the middle.Maybe it is me spinning that is pulling the rope.
I am in my bed, alone and there is some mindless television on in the background, I am tempted to turn to a music channel but it is not like it used to be. I’ll take the plunge. It is also liable to have me reminiscing.
I am having trouble trying to decide on what my two rope ends characteristics are. Both have an abundance of street knowledge, both tall dark and handsome, I guess while one has a slightly more roguish dress sense, the other carries more flair and adaptable charisma to match.
My rogue and I have on two occasions tried to date, once as young fun and once seriously. Neither worked, personally I feel it was due to surrounding factors, wrong house and wrong location. The phrase another time and place is a perfect fit. Ask Rogue however and he said it was as he couldn’t provide financially for me as a family. So he said this week while Mr Flair went on a marathon.
I will take this moment to add I am an independent woman, with one dependent from a previous relationship and by no means am looking for a sugar daddy – if he found me however – well.
Given what his values are Rogue may be better suited as Mr Family Man.
Along comes Mr Flair, agreed fun, you know that relationship you have with a stunning gent. It is not intended to be a serious affair but as quick as you can light a match it turns intense. So much emotion is flowing, nothing else exists, views are the same, feelings the same, ugh pure perfection. Until as always you have ridiculous rows over nothing of sense.
This is myself and Mr Flair, we have never been in a relationship although we behaved and bickered like we were. The jealousy on his part when “we’re not in a relationship” was actually amusing. Not so however, is how often we went through it.
Anyway, Mr Flair and I had out final ruck, over nothing in particular but we can’t continue to carry on this way, as it is more damaging than this heartbreak is now. Off he runs, rope around his ankle and true to form, who should come smack bang into my door?
“Hey Family Man, how goes it, come to your birthday party, sure”.
“Let me know the details”
“If you want me to come you need to send me the info”
“hello”
Oh so he’ll answer the phone to a private number.
I spare you all the mush in between; any love story fanatic can fill in the gaps.
So let me reintroduce myself, My name is Ms Nolongertied tostring, I recently put down a saw and severed the two loves of my live. The two types, one in love, one had love (still have love). One has run and the other well he only has friendship ability to return should he look hard enough.
As much as I managed to cut and hurt myself in the process, I feel strangely empowered by my absolute singleness. I have one child who adores me and I adore my child. That is what matters and I will heal. I guess on occasion you have to hurt yourself to heal yourself.